My Single Black Haitian Mother | Ep: 01 – New Series: The Black Woman


This is a new series that I will be starting on this channel. I will addressing subjects that I hear people bring up often about black women. This series is called THE BLACK WOMAN, please if you have any request leave them below or send them to my inbox.

My mother never closed the door for my father or his family to come around. They promised and promised and she just looked at them and gave a smile. I always knew that I should never get overly happy when my father came around. Thank goodness my mother had brothers and cousins living in the United States to be a positive role model. I don’t have any feeling for my father. How can I when I don’t know him? He never addressed why he walked away when my brother was 2 and I baking in the oven.

My bio father was mad that my mother didn’t give me his last name. Asked me to change it because I was the only one of his kids that didn’t have his name. I told him that will never happen i’m an Olibrice through and through.

Legally I have to be 35 to adopt a kid from Haiti. But yes I will have my own.

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  1. We have similarities when it comes to our fathers being in and out…throughout our lives. Im 29 but ive made a point to accept him for what he knows and doesnt know and despite his inperfection. He is still partially floating through my veins and i like hearing his stories today about the crazy life he lead when i was younger wishing he would live w us. He had a hard life and through his stories and experiences and sitting and talking w him it help me see that its a cycle my grandfather really hurt my dad and possibly caused him to not want to be close to anyone. So although that is no excuse and he should have moved passed his peraonal issues…i still believe God kept him at a distance for a reason and id probably be a pretty crazy and confused individual had he been w us full time. He was at just the distance God needed him to be at. I like who he is today. He is still his selfish self but i know that and expect nothing more..and cant be offended. 

  2. I hate when they do that and sometimes married women chime in too in degrading women who are single mothers. In some forums that I used to frequent back in the days, I used to dialogue with these males so much and tried to reason with them so they can stop the name calling of loose women or referencing their kids as bastards that they used to be leveled down to nothing once I'm done with them. lol! then the one-liner came out, "oh, you are so defensive because you're one of those single mothers, right? I got you and that's when I would reply to them wrong, because I have no kids at all nor was I raised by a single mother; I am sticking up to what is right and let them know that I won't stand by and let them render the single mothers on there depressed when they are the one out of the two parents who created that child, to step to the plate and take care of him/her.

  3. @CurlyKelz:Sweetheart, you need to take several, several seats!!! First of all, I had every right to say what I did! And 2nd, I took responsibility for my actions, that's why my daughter is alive & well today. I was working before I knew I was pregnant, I worked through my pregnancy, & went back after having her, to support her. Her father tried for yrs to get w/me & I refused. We broke up bcuz I decided that things were just moving to fast, hence the denial of his child when I later turned up to be pregnant! The silver lining it's that he has now stepped up to support her, & the dna result is 99.99%! I didn't have another child until my daughter was 5, & that man is the same father of my other children. My mother always has a parable in Creole, & an appropriate 1 for my situation was: You can steal a father, but you cant steal a mother, basically her way of telling me to support my child! We can take responsibility, & many of us do, but that doesn't mean the man won't walk away, or even worse, be in the relationship & not take responsibility! I've seen cases where the mother walked & left Dad w/the kids! Trust me, if you can think it, someone's done it! 

  4. Wow thank you for sharing your story I've been there and I know its not easy but life most go on and I have no regrets to treat him like he did to me.. What goes around come around

  5. You are soooo right! My oldest, her biological father didn't take responsibility for her in anyway until she was 13. Despite mutual friends telling him to a dna test! Finally went through w/the child support, & lo & behold 99.99%! So the day after he comes to see her for the 1st time ever, he calls to see if he can take her to church! I had to remind him again of how he's not been there for 13 yrs, & he'll have to spend supervised time w/her & build a relationship before taking her anywhere! Still waiting, but at least he's helping financially now. Yes there are women out there who place themselves in this predicament, despite knowing the guys'reputation, but there are some of us out there who have/are suffering bcuz weak minded men make excuses instead of taking responsibility for their actions!!! Worst of the lot are the ones from single Mom households, & put their child/ren through the same heartaches!

  6. Hi Olina, thank you for sharing your story! I can imagine that it was very hard for you growing up. Although I can't relate, I understand the feeling of rejection that comes with the abandonment. I admire your mother for what she has done. She could've serve his behind with child support but she didn't and that's what makes me admire her the most! I do wanna advise you to 1)forgive your dad's cowardliness and 2) don't let your mom's experience hinder you in having a potentially good marriage with a good man. Learn from them though. God bless!
    P.S.: Your hair is poppiiiiiiiiiiiiiing! lol!

  7. Olina. Very open blog. You know the saying "Some can mess it up for all". Because of the actions of a few "Single mothers" it damaged the view point of people towards all "Single mothers". But everybody's situation is totally different. You Mom being a prime example, did everything she could to raise her children and raise them right. You're right in saying that these black women laid down with black men and had these children but a lot of these women had children with men who already had a reputation of doing this but these women expected to be the "exception". I think that's where most of the backlash is directed. Still, we can not put all single mothers in one basket. In relationships, there's always two sides and a lot of times, only one side or view point is given. Knowing the reason someone left may answer a lot of questions especially of why they weren't around. Even though I agree that there should never be a reason for a Father to not be present, but a reason is always in order. Sometimes people are going through things that they have never spoken to anyone about.

    P.S. I think @ sporo2000 wants to get you pregnant! Lol!

  8. See I am your No 1 fan. I am the first to watch this video. I want to hit the refresh button and see one view and one like there.

    Olina I would be deeply disappointed if you opted to adopt rather than have your own children within or outside  wedlock. The idea of a healthy, kind of plump  – I prefer the term 'well-rounded' (I am African, we like that), vivacious women opting not to have children of her own make me sad. You come across as such perfect mother material.
    You ought to make your own unique personal sexual energy and genetic contribution. Even if you adopt your first child you can still have your own children.

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